Pondering Ponderer Gifts

'Life's a swamp and then you croak.'

'The mind-body problem is best expressed in the formulation...OOf!'

'Do you ever wonder about this whole 'money' thing?'

Hmmm... what's my real purpose? Why am I here? - 'Ooh! Ooh! Me! Me! Let me guess!' - 'Go on, then.' - 'Is your life a homage mediocrity?' - 'Ouch.' - 'Quizzes are fun! Ask me more!' -

'... And some primitive cultures, believed that 'the great ones' modelled us from clay.'

"If a stock falls in the market, and it had no investors, does it really lose its value?"

"Counsel for prose is overruled. Poetry, you may continue."

'Things have really livened up down there since You introduced SEXUAL reproduction.'

The Philosopher Pine, or, The Eternal Optimist.

"Have you been playing dice?"

"Intelligent design...well, duh!"

'Oh, so now the ocean isn't GOOD enough for you?'

"He's his own worst enemy."

Sauce for the Goose

Freudian Bar & Grill...Jungian Pub: 'We can out drink those Freudians ant day of the week!...'And twice on Sunday!' ...'Yeah!' ... e

A small number of people are afraid of heights, but there is an epidemic fear of widths.

"Needs to get a life"

"When we're home, are we still aliens?"

"Mrs. Marsha Mullhouse, of Kenosha, Wisconsin, asks, "Are You subject to the laws of physics, or are the laws of physics subject to You?"

"I think you'll find the pen is writier than the sword."

'Half an optimist is an odd bird, Sarah.'

'Doctor, I don't want to eat mouseburgers, I want to be normal like everybody else.'

'The organizational structure is pretty simple: We do the work; they take the credit.'

"No, I don't want to live forever, but I damn sure don't want to be dead forever, either."

'Gosh, I dunno. You sure it's organic?'

'I hate to tell you this, but enlightenment just isn't for commuters.'

'Look at it another way. Happiness can't buy you money!'

'At least I don't have his life.'

Afraid of change - leave it here.

The probability of an event occurring is inversely proportional to its desirability.

'...and that is my philosophy.'

'Why am I the one always getting kicked?'

"It all started when I read somewhere that happiness is an inside job. Naturally, I assumed some breaking and entering was involved."

"A journey of a thousand miles must begin with a single malt."

"And the meaning of life is.... oh rats, the battery died."