Poultry Practitioner Gifts

"I don't like the look of this!"

The Rooster Comedian.

'Oh, it's a long, long time...From here to November...'

'That'll teach the pesky python to be greedy and eat all my chickens!'

"She wishes to range free!"

"At $4 a dozen, it's hard to balance a career and a family."

'Don't fall for all that...you should see him first thing in the morning.'

Chicken Little was correct about something falling, unfortunately, it was an axe, and not the sky.

'Chicken Farms - Pecking Order'

"OK, now another guy found a feather in his soup! One of you is molting, and I need to know who!"

'Why did the chicken cross the road?'

"Has anyone turned in a chicken?"

'I told him not to wear stretchy pants to dinner.'

Where Deviled Eggs come from

"I can assure you ladies all our eggs come from free range chickens."

'Superstock'

'Take my advice kid. Enjoy yourself now, because once you get married, your free ranging days are over.'

'Can he come out and play?'

"Don't be so dramatic. You tell me you're pregnant every day?"

'She looks just like you when you were that age.'

"The last one is Uncle Charlie. He was pardoned in 1987."

'First give me the food - then you get the egg.'

Lady taking her Cochin chickens for a walk.

"You look ridiculous Ed. Why can't you just accept you're going bald and ditch the wig?"

"It wasn't a farming accident. She just bit my head off again."

"It's a destination wedding invitation. We have to cross the road."

"I can't believe this! Is there anyone here who isn't too chicken to jump?"

"At long last we've discovered evidence of a poultrygeist!"

"Shouldn't there be some sort of pecking order around here?"

'George, stop playing with the children.'

"I've had 720 children. I hope they're all doing well."

'I admire your can-cock-a-doodle-do attitude.'

Cop gives ASBO to cockerel: 'This of this as a cock-a-doodle-don't.'

"My once perky chicken breasts hang like flapjacks, I don't lay eggs anymore, I'm burning up with hot flashes, I'm...."

"Yeah, our garden is always a mess: We can't stop ourselves foraging for worms..."