Police Satire Enthusiast Gifts

Rape and Pillage Squad

Police Strike - 'Shall we beat ourselves up?'

"Hey stupid - come over here.'

Police Stop 'n' Search Department

"There you go with that typical police mentality."

'Looks like the latest crime figures have been stolen.'

Excessive Paperwork

'Asking for a lawyer was a good move. You can't outsmart the cops by yourself.' (Lawyer is a puppet being operated by policeman).

"Do you want to order a contract killing, Don Carlos, or a pay-as-you-go killing?"

"Just put one foot directly in front of the other, sir, and walk in as straight a line as possible."

"Do you recognize the one who stole your tractor?"

"It was passed from my grandfather to my father, from my father to me, and now from me to you. Twenty bucks."

"Next time the killer comes on your radio do not say 'COPY THAT'."

'Have you any idea what speed you were doing, sir?'

Mafia machine gun case.

'...if you don't stop..er..singing Mr Bieber I'll arrest you for possessing an offensive weapon as well as drunk driving.'

Money Launderette

The Automatic Policeman

"Victor one to control...we want to report a stolen car, Sergent - A white saloon with a little blue flashing light on top..."

Okay, knock it off. I'm not falling for the old "good fish, bad fish" routine.

Oh, sorry, I didn

Prison Vacation For Mafiosi

Crooks

'Hello, Sir. Are you answering this call on a hands-free mobile?' 'Em...'

' We have ways of making them talk but how do we make them shut up ?!! '

Police Picket Line - Do Not Cross.

'Armed robbery, eh? I'm in for being out of compliance with a Federal guideline

'Great News - it's not psoriasis . . . it's just an itchy trigger finger.'

"Did any of these guys sell you the acid?"

'Even my three year old doesn't believe in that last one.'

'Illegal immigrant.'

Police dancing behind line - titled 'Police Line Dancing'.

Tunnel of Love

'There you go again - laying down the law.'

"OK, since you have a medical card the cat nip is legal, but I'm going to be watching you."