Police Satire Fan Gifts

'There you go again - laying down the law.'

'Illegal immigrant.'

Police Picket Line - Do Not Cross.

"Be sure to have your body cams on."

CHANNEL THIRTEEN TAKES ON THE NETWORKS

"There you go with that typical police mentality."

"If we could explain it in Hip-hop, officer?. . . It would be like this!"

"So then how do you explain trigonometry, tough guy!"

Cop Shop/Fake evidence/Plant now for spring.

'Looks like the latest crime figures have been stolen.'

Petty Aero Larceny - I Stealing a Dinner.

'I'll be happy to provide a blood sample but it won't be mine.'

Excessive Paperwork

"Just put one foot directly in front of the other, sir, and walk in as straight a line as possible."

'You got a search warrant?'

'Asking for a lawyer was a good move. You can't outsmart the cops by yourself.' (Lawyer is a puppet being operated by policeman).

'I wish I could do Search and Rescue too: When you're a Police Dog, the people you find don't actually want to be found...'

"Cut. Cut. You call this a crime scene?"

"No. 3 step forward and whine, 'Please, Mom, I'm forty-four years old—I can tie my own tie.'"

Wimpy Harry

"Next time the killer comes on your radio do not say 'COPY THAT'."

'Have you any idea what speed you were doing, sir?'

'First off, your average Paolozzi has far fewer holes than your Moore.'

The Automatic Policeman

Baggage Claim: Anyone Who Knows How To Hot-Wire A Car.

"Victor one to control...we want to report a stolen car, Sergent - A white saloon with a little blue flashing light on top..."

' We have ways of making them talk but how do we make them shut up ?!! '

Crooks

'Hello, Sir. Are you answering this call on a hands-free mobile?' 'Em...'

Okay, knock it off. I'm not falling for the old "good fish, bad fish" routine.

Oh, sorry, I didn

'Great News - it's not psoriasis . . . it's just an itchy trigger finger.'

'Relax, he's just doing his job. Try not to bite his head off.'

"He's currently unavailable. Would you care to wait?"

'Is he expecting you?'