Playful Gift Giver Pillows

sex shop - "Theres plenty more filth inside"

"Cheers! Well, this is exciting. I've never had a dinner date with a duck before." "Relax, honey. I'm just here for the bread."

"But he had a mask and I thought he was a burglar."

"Happy Anniversary, dear! It's a gold spray-painted macaroni necklace."

"And at no extra charge I can give your old suit a Viking funeral."

Christmas Presents.

That must be my computer date... (Answers door to robot).

"Shouldn't have, you really."

"Remember when we talked about how you send mixed messages. . ."

'We may need to remove your spleen because it might not be doing whatever it is the spleen does.'

My therapist cured me of using humour as a defense...these days I pack a .45.

"Recycled, Wayne, we'd prefer 'recycled'."

'And it comes with oven mitts, butter, sour cream and chives.'

'Darling, I want you to have this lock of my hair to remind you how much I love you.'

"It's not a moustache kiddo: It's nasal hair..."

'Hand these out to the workforce.'

"I'd hate to see the flea big enough to wear those!"

Shop for cats

WC problem.

"The party was a total surprise! Everybody jumped out and screamed 'Happy Birthday' just as I was licking my balls!"

Quicksand Swamp - Cheap Burial Plots.

Frankenstein's Monster receiving birthday present.

'You did want him wrapped, didn't you?'

'I'd be more impressed that you bought me flowers if you didn't take a job as a delivery boy to get the employee discount.'

'Nothing from the Nobel Committee or the National Endowment for the Arts, but 'Joe' wants you to write some napkins for his bar.'

Cow Christmas anxiety dreams!

'Sure - They're still chocolates. It's just that the liver-shaped box was cheaper than the heart-shaped one.'

Masky Christmas!

'I did say we were going to give you transport...I didn't say what sort!'