Parent-child Humor Lovers Pillows

'Don't worry about me, mom, I'll be fine as long as you keep working!'

You can't just switch them. If your wife asked you to change the baby, she probably meant the diaper.

"This is where baby gets some alone time."

"Your mother and I are feeling overwhelmed, so you'll have to bring yourselves up."

'Son, sometimes I think you don't know your head from your tail. Come to think of it, it is tough.'

'Budget cuts have forced us to drop our day-care program. I've contacted your mother to come and pick you up.'

Impracticle Guide to Having Babies

"My dad can't talk yet, but he's learned to wave bye-bye."

"Time for bed, guys."

The Wright brothers discover the first nightmare flight

'Well it's your fault for wearing my slippers.'

"I'm SO lazy, I married a pregnant woman. . . !"

"I have to wear a bike helmet all the time after Mommie heard cars kill more pedestrians than cyclists!"

Ultra Sound/Downloading.

Young Godzilla.

"I'm worried that Ud isn't evolving as quickly as the other kids."

'Don't clean me up too good... no one will recognize me.'

"But mom, I can't clean my room now. I just won the Kids Bedroom Seal of Approval!"

"I'm trying to make them look less scary."

"I'd like my son seated in the first row."

"Your mom is a little overprotective, isn't she?"

Baby eating "Uploading", Baby on toilet "Downloading"

'You can stop looking-I just remembered I didn't wear my retainer today. Funny, huh?'

"He started teething this morning."

'I already had one bath today! You want my skin to wear out?'

'....How many babies are you going to have, mommy?"

'Pack your things we're moving.'

"But Mom said to ask YOU!"

I arrived, I Ate, I Conquered (aka Pooped).

'He took his first step!'

"Stop following me! I taught you all that I know."

"You claimed I was getting on your last nerve. Having only one nerve left sounds serious, so I called an ambulance."

"Excuse me, can you tell me where I might find the colostrum?"