Nfl Aficionado Gifts

Thoughts of Fall

"Portrait of a Lady"

Oscar would laugh whenever he recalled his empty existence before golf.

"He tested positive for a new fever ... TB12."

'And when did you have your last owl movement?'

"Good game, good game, nice game, namaste, good game, nice game ..."

'Did you want to bring on a sub'

'Fancy a game of five-a-side, boys?'

United Football Club: In, Out, VAR.

'It's cutting edge theatre.'

'He's got classic form, but if he doesn't improve his grades he won't get into college. He doesn't think.'

'When I'm not thinking about me, the Giants, the Knicks or the Yankees, I'm thinking about us.'

Bernie the Monday morning quarterback meets David the Monday morning linebacker.

"And now, since our local teams really stink, here are scores for actual good teams around the country that you might want to root for."

'You haven't heard the best thing. . .no referees.'

The Harper Plays Cricket.

'When I was a kid, we had to do our own instant replays.'

"Wait! Stop! He changed his mind."

Cristiano Ronaldo

'He's missed six goals today. I bet he could kick himself.'

'Talk about ridiculous... we can spot a mouse a mile away, and still can't read a darn newspaper!'

"I need to buy a faster fastball."

NFL quarterback slides feet-first to the ground and avoids a mugging,

'He ordered those 'natural male enhancements',and now he watches football all the time!'

"Yes, it's a sports related injury. He dropped his bowling ball."

'Yo, Corona! Pack your stuff! You've been traded.'

Football.

"Depressed, anxious, worried about the future we've had a great deal of this recently...I'd suggest you avoid watching England for a while."

Fox hunting.

Playing football with snowmen in goal.

'It took some doing, but we got your name on!'