Nfl Devotee Gifts

'Just a word of advice ... He's a Saints' fan.'

"He always get emotional when th super bow;'s on and the end of football season is finally here..."

"Let's go watch TV I hear there are bowl games on."

"He tested positive for a new fever ... TB12."

Bernie the Monday morning quarterback meets David the Monday morning linebacker.

"Wait! Stop! He changed his mind."

'Frank's last request was that he be cremated and that I never give up his season tickets.'

Rest in Peace Instant Replay

NFL quarterback slides feet-first to the ground and avoids a mugging,

"Edgar isn't here. He's working out with the Dallas Cowboys."

'Stop! Don't try to move him until we get his insurance information!'

"Well, dad. . . when I was a kid I got in trouble for trampling on the lawn or for beating up others. . . today, I get a lot of money for it!"

"Too mean for hell?....Welcome to heaven, Mr. Butkus."

Football Delivery

'I guess you're not from around here. In this region of the country football is in the religion section.'

'...Do the Hokey-Pokey and turn yourselves around...'

'Those with a lot of Money.'

Super Bowl 2012: The NFL finds a way to appease displaced ticket holders.

Look! Up in the sky! It's absurd! It's inane! It's "Malaprop Man"! Malaprop man! Where are you going? To a processional footbrawl game! The Tampa Bay Bucketeers and New York Jest are playing. Are you a serious fan? Yeah, I've a sneezin' ticket holder for years! Isn't it early to go to the stadium? We nave a snailgate party in the barking lot. I drill chicken winks and square ribs! Do you get nervous watching your team play? Yes, I'm very dense during the games! And before and aft

Shirley knew that Dennis would love his new 'Tackling Grunts of Famous Linebackers' clock.

"Bad news: all those pink NFL uniforms don't actually cure breast cancer."

"Fifty yard line! I bet you thought it was a silly necklace..."

A angel wearing a helmet poised to throw a football down from heaven.

"Should we have dinner now, or are you watching in real time?"

"London prepares for the arrival of Philly sports fans."

NFL's 50 Most Masterful Uses of the Clock

Tom Brady retires after finally seeing his shadow

"This new NFL video is great! It factors in the strength of each team's offense, defense, special teams and legal teams."

'If we're 'a team', how come I have to do all the painting?'

"Sometimes I question his priorities."

"So. . . no, you are not going to root for another team."

'Excuse me, coach - but are we the hugs or the kisses?'

Thoughts of Fall

I love Kung Fu.

Cam Newton