Football Aficionado Gifts

'Yeah, it's wine, and it's also why there's a 50-year waiting list to coach football in Napa Valley.'

"When they say it's the end of regulation, they're talking about the game, not our industry."

'It's impossible to dive off one of these.'

Football Snail

"What sports fan are you?"

"I cloned myself to take care of my Thanksgiving duties while I watch football in peace."

Sisyphus

United Football Club: In, Out, VAR.

David de Gea

'That's David James, that's Sven...'

Football thug

'When I was a kid, we had to do our own instant replays.'

'Did you want to bring on a sub'

'You don't like football? What a weirdo!!!'

Playing football with snowmen in goal.

Football Plants

'He was a great player...he gained 'many cap's' for his Country !'

'Structural strength test? Next door!'

"Look - after paying eight million quid for you, we couldn't afford a new strip."

'He ordered those 'natural male enhancements',and now he watches football all the time!'

'That's Al.. he has an old football injury.'

"Portrait of a Lady"

"Let's go watch TV I hear there are bowl games on."

Oscar would laugh whenever he recalled his empty existence before golf.

If nobody had invented graphics

Punt Cake

"Do you do temporary ones that last about two weeks?"

"Good game, good game, nice game, namaste, good game, nice game ..."

'Originally he was the mascot until we discovered he had a golden foot.'

'I don't understand why you always put me in goal?!'

Bears

Football

'How many times have I told you not to hit the ball with your head?'

'Yes, Jenny, I know I'm always reminding the team to be good sports, but you really don't have to thank the ref after every call.'

"I'm not using my jumper as a goalpost, sir, I'm using it as a jumper."