Mountain Climbing Humorist Gifts

"Don't be embarrassed. Most heroic archetypes your age have lost the ability to swashbuckle."

Man painting over a 'You are here' sign.

Skiing.

"Oh my gosh, honey! Look out!"

Irritable trowel syndrome.

"Well if it comes to that you're not exactly Mr Wonderful."

'I've been sitting on this mountain for 25 years, and what I've learned is that true happiness can only be found in the soothing relief of a fast-acting hemorrhoid cream!'

"If the meeting goes on for longer than scheuled...I'm prepared!"

Pop Top Ice FIshing

Mountain climbers, "Someone's been here before us."

Bird Symbol Hunting

'You sure complain a lot for someone who says he loves nature.'

LOOK BHIND U!

"Only 150 kids? - Have you considered fertility treatment?"

'Clayton enjoys living on the edge,'

"Perhaps I should have warned you...They really don't like wholemeal bread."

Due To High Winds Crawling Is Banned Today

'I do enjoy the winter olympics.'

"Geez, Dude. I asked for a slight trim. Not a Brazilian wax."

"Have you farted. . . ?"

Fork in the trail.

'I just know baby is getting as much out of this world trip as we are.'

"Yes, I'm the wise man who lives on the top of the mountain. And believe me, the surcharge for the pizza delivery service is insane!"

'...And if that doesn't work, grab your rifle and start blasting away.'

Echo Mountain...NO Yodeling! - Falling rock zone.

'If a bear attacks and I have to play dead I want it to be as convincing as possible!'

Ranger has sign saying 'Do not feed the bears'. Bear crosses out sign to read 'Feed the bears'.

"Have you ever actually seen a chicken cross the road?"

'I told you: The way down is faster.'

"Yes, I do know how to light a fire with two sticks... Provided one of them is a match."

"And then, after they were done with their bodies, they baked them at 350 degrees for an hour."

'Look Dad - bigfoot!'

Fish Training

Fly fishing.

'Organically-grown popcorn? Give me a break!'