Joke-loving Climber Gifts

Climbing Mount Rushmore

Man painting over a 'You are here' sign.

"If I'd known we'd be this long wandering the wilderness I would never have worn these heels."

Cow Blue Arrows

'I hate to say I told you so, Larry, but that's why you check your car for bears before you put on your seatbelt.'

"Who's next?"

'You sure complain a lot for someone who says he loves nature.'

"If the meeting goes on for longer than scheuled...I'm prepared!"

LOOK BHIND U!

Due To High Winds Crawling Is Banned Today

Fork in the trail.

"Yes, I'm the wise man who lives on the top of the mountain. And believe me, the surcharge for the pizza delivery service is insane!"

'We were hoping You'd just say 'Be fruitful and multiply' again.'

Man with twisted legs using a twisted walking stick.

'I told you: The way down is faster.'

'It's going to be hard to get lost in these woods!'

'Look Dad - bigfoot!'

The wife made it. Why?

"Do you hear dueling tubas?"

"First you forget the flag! Now you tell me you don't know how to yodel!"

THE GRAND TETONS EN BUSTIER

'Just stop for a minute. Smell that pine scent. Drink in the view. I don't think we could pick a better site for our 'Mega-Mall'!'

"Because we're jerks."

Physicists' Convention: Quantum Leap.

Learning Theory Therapy: Cue/Drive/Response/Reinforcement.

'Guilty? Do you realize what that will do to my 'Who's Who' listing?'

"My GPS says we’re not even close to the trail … and it’s blaming you."

"What do I do when I get to the top?"

There's no way you could have attained Nirvana already — you don't even have hemorrhoids yet.

"Wow! Joe really did a nice job on the latrine."

'He hasn't done anything yet, it's just with all this gear on, he can't stand up!'

'Looks like we're having bacon and eggs for breakfast. Ready?'

"How'd you know I was from New York?"

"It's customary to climb all the way up."

'Hike the Alps? I'm getting out of breath just keeping my foot on the accelerator!'