Matchmaker Enthusiasts Pillows

'No need to put my details in darlin'... You're the girl for me!'

"...and someone with no fleas. Anything else?"

"Sure, it's more efficient. But I still miss shooting the arrows."

'Don't let the photo put you off, it was taken when he was under the spell of a wicked witch.'

"And there was I thinking you'd been Beta tested."

"Have you tried carbon dating?"

"Here's one, Matey! 'Must Love Parrots.'"

'Jane, cancel all my appointments for the rest of the week.'

'Okay, but not in person -- I prefer on-line dating.'

"That whole internet dating thing....It killed me, I tell ya."

"When the dating agency said you were full of beans..."

Today's love

"It must have been fate that brought us together."

'Fred, don't you think you're over doing it a bit?'

'Sir, you wanted an affectionate date capable of long term friendship...you said nothing about being allergic to fleas.'

They knew they were made for each other when their eyes met from across the room at the Same Socks Bar,

"She says you sound like 'fun'!"

"I don' want another weather forcaster - they're too unpredictable."

Acme Dating Service

"Men just won't leave me alone!"

"...and if anyone here suspects that the algorithm that put these two together might be flawed, speak now..."

'Top is right! He's a scaffolder working on a tower block'

Lonely Hearts Dating Agency - "Mmm he's a bit of a dish."

"'Single'? With this kind of income? Oh, have I got a dependant for you!"

Match maker

"AI can now scan dating sites and find your best match."

"Of all the finger-painting classes in all the day-care centers in all the world, you had to walk into mine."

Sidekick speed matching service.

"I did warn you. Mum can take her time warming to a new boyfriend."

"Nothing works with this guy. Would you like us to shoot the pool guy?"

"Ironically, I think I'm experiencing job burn out!"

'But how can we be sure the dating service didn't make a mistake?'

Body language interpreters - "He likes you and wishes to dance with you." "That's a get lost."

'Are you fit, attractive male...?'

Cupid's converge on a bachelor.