Matchmaking Aficionado Pillows

"AI can now scan dating sites and find your best match."

'Don't let the photo put you off, it was taken when he was under the spell of a wicked witch.'

 'It's really simple, Scruffy. Just put your scent on this card and we'll run it through the computer.'

"You don't know me well enough to not care how I look."

"We met through the personals. We both were seeking someone 'Rubenesque'."

'I really can't stay for dessert. Why don't you stay and DVR the rest of the date for me?'

I'm your girlfriend and best friend so I get twice as many slices

"Here's one, Matey! 'Must Love Parrots.'"

Drive in movies.

"Yes, he was very nice, Mom, but he had to cut the date short because it was... 'report card time'!"

Dating - "Oh, and she must have a sense of humour."

"Do you have a boyfriend?"

"You lack spontaniety."

"Let's do it, let's fall in love!"

"It's the wine talking. I stopped speaking to you twenty minutes ago due to lack of interest."

"I'm experiencing bouts of heavy breathing and dizziness when I'm speed dating!"

'Fred, don't you think you're over doing it a bit?'

Biological Cuckoo clock

'That's the last time I'm sitting in the front row!'

"Ideally, I'm looking for a guy who can make me smile."

Ostrich Bar

'Are you ready to get hurt again?'

'You remind me of my ex-ex-ex.'

"Let me slip into something more humorous."

Women's Idea of Sharing/Men's Idea of Sharing.

'You think you're an incurable romantic? My prescription is to get married.'

"I hope you don't think I'm the kind who would hibernate on the first date."

When kissing a woman, try not to burp.

"That was a great kiss, Joey...but can I have my gum back please?"

A Tree Grows In . . . Wherever.

"I've become so good at dating—relationships that used to take months now last a matter of days."

'It's our fifth date, so I'll take a box of impatience.'

"'Single'? With this kind of income? Oh, have I got a dependant for you!"

"Ask me anything you want about Water Cress!"

"I did warn you. Mum can take her time warming to a new boyfriend."