Manuscript Mavens Gifts

'This is all without rhyme or reason.'

"My novel is not a doorstop!"

Micro Psychiatry Clinic. You have a full schedule today, Doctor. The helium atom will be here to work on his fear of heights. The white blood cell with a germ phobia and amoeba with separation anxiety are coming in. The DNA molecule will be here about an identity crisis. And here, in the sports car, comes a new patient, a carbon-14 isotope. Ah, looks like he's going through a half-life crisis!

'A cousin to the hammerhead, here we see the allusive, yet, handy, multi-use shark.'

"The saying Use It or Lose It isn’t referring to one’s appetite."

The writers group met every Tuesday for support and fellowship.

Superbug Research Go For It / Got it

'Surely they're not ALL still in their offices!'

Prepare to meet thy mechanic.

'I'm an atheist!'

Man blending in to his chair is reading Optical Illusion Monthly magazine.

GQ Magazine: Stay at Home Special.

'You seem quieter tonight. Did they give you something to help you relax?'

'She's one of our nurses hiding from the patient load.'

Look on the bright side...they'll probably name a disease after you.

News and Magazines. Tax Bill Debate. The trickle-down can never compete with siphon-up.

"I prefer 'prostitute'. 'Media whore' implies that I'm not getting paid."

Pre-Old Blues

'Which fashion magazine do you recommend?'

'I know my instruments are sterilized every day but I have no idea who does it.'

'Gastroenterology...do I know that?'

'Well, we're off for our xmas break - I'm sure you can manage without us for a couple of weeks.'

"An appointment? Let's see... She could fit you in before breakfast TV, or after lunch on Radio Two, or between Radio Four afternoon and the Drive Home SHow..."

There's a popular new health spa down there. The endorphins are having a blast in aerobics. Antibodies are learning kickboxing and the adrenaline is getting some much needed relaxation in the yoga studio. The only problem is the water molecules. Everybody is concerned about them! What's wrong? They haven't been seen since they went into the sauna!

"We really have to catch up on our New Yorkers."

Who Wore It Best?

Vaccine hurdles

Celebrity Gavin Henson

A newspaper stand in a rural area.

Punch Magazine - "You've got a circulation problem."

'No, go ahead and critique my mss. I'm always ok ... after the initial reaction.'

'We're trying to use a team approach to medicine, but we're having trouble fitting everyone!'

'Where does it hurt?'

'The first thing we will do is select a block captain.'

ANd the Oscar for the best special side effects goes to ASTRAZENECA!