Maintenance Worker Gifts

'You mean nobody knows where they put the fuse box?'

'I'll fix you! But Good!'

'How do you propose to repair the roof from down there?!'

'OK, what's the first thing we need to capture in our Job Safety Analysis?' 'Don't tick off TINY!'

'Please report any drips to maintenance immediately.'

'You said to call back if the gas problem got worse.'

"Desktops are off-limits. Anything on the floor is sweepers-keepers."

"Let's not panic till we know whether it's coming in or going out."

Using teamwork to paint a lamppost.

'I think I found the problem.'

"Hello. I'm here to install the new pastor."

'Note to self - fix air conditioner.'

'I don't have time to explain. Just call the super and tell him the elevator's stuck.'

Instead of hunting gazelle tonight, let's call maintenance, say we have a short and eat the electrician when he arrives.

'It's $50 for fixing the sink, and $300 for babysitting your husband.'

Out of order, out of order.

Out of Order (numbers out of order)

'Yep, it's just what I suspected: You've sprung a leak in the main corporate coffee supply line!'

'Don't mind us, we're just studying technique.'

"This doesn't exactly fill me with confidence, I must admit."

"Here's where all the worries of the world have been seeping into your home."

'If you can smile when everything around you is going wrong... you're probably in the repair business!'

Out of Order (passengers in elevator are upside down).

'The door to my office is always open so please have it fixed.'

'Now then, what seems to be the problem?'

Support staff staff.

"Go back! The place is full of mold!"

Man in lift thinking 'Please get stuck' as woman thinks 'Please don't get stuck.'

'My office is always open to you Charles, at least until maintenance repairs the door lock.'

'You better take care of the bill quickly or there's going to be hell to pay.'

'I'm calling maintenance to tell them about the leak in the ceiling. The acid rain is neutralizing our basic research.'

Sign on door is misspelt and has fallen down. Man says: 'Hmmm, that's a bad sign.'

"Can't make the conference call..."

'Call Maintenance...I need them to check the output on this defibrillator.'

'Good, lots of waxy buildup.'