Maintenance Work Gifts

'Well actually, I'm a plumber!'

"I finally found a use for that old home repair book..."

'Dang it, I just washed this street. Boy, every time...'

"These colder temperatures always cause my tire pressure to drop—it's a good thing I stopped to check." Peter finally grows up.

"You've just got to have the biggest and the best, have'nt you?!"

"Would you please step into the garage? Your car and I need to have a word with you."

Mechanic looking under the hood of a car.

Neighbor Leaf Wars

"I'd like a new tire for my 1976 Chevy Chevette."

"Because when you go first nobody else has any fun, that's why."

The witch of the west again showed no water usage for the month.

Deflator mouse

"I sensed you needed my help. I’m Saint &@!#%&!!, the patron saint of cursing."

"He loves his leaf blower."

Gondolier skimming up leaves in pool.

It's only firing on 87 cylinders!

'You change him, and I'll change the tire.'

"Lovely dovetail."

'You're using 14' nails on a 2' door? This is definitely a case where bigger is not better.'

Lady about flat tire: 'It's not too bad - it's only flat on the bottom.'

"One more rinse and the inside of your car will be clean too, Dad."

Home De-Po. Things you need for your project. Things you didn't know you needed until you were halfway through your project.

Not much money, glory, or praise

"Must get a longer cable."

'You raised the price of air to 50c!' 'Inflation.'

Auto parts, Lite Puff Pastries, & Health Insurance Exchange.

'Well, that's fixed that.'

"It took a lot of work to build this car..."

'Wilbur took really, really good care of his car.'

"You're developing a nice, rich compost down here."

'If I was this car I wouldn't let you in the drivers seat!'

Kid about scratched up car to dad: 'I made a mistake washing the car with a brillo pad.'

"2 for 1 special: Clean, polish, buff, seal"

'Well OF COURSE I rotate the tires! How do you think I got here?'

Lazy plumber.