Maintenance Crew Gifts

Council worker sweeping under car.

Perspective repair

Your tax $ at work...unless it's a weekend, one of 17 holidays or after 4 PM!

"I called maintenance. They said if it gets any bigger they'll send someone up."

"I finally found a use for that old home repair book..."

'Dang it, I just washed this street. Boy, every time...'

"These colder temperatures always cause my tire pressure to drop—it's a good thing I stopped to check." Peter finally grows up.

"I sensed you needed my help. I’m Saint &@!#%&!!, the patron saint of cursing."

"He loves his leaf blower."

Neighbor Leaf Wars

The witch of the west again showed no water usage for the month.

Gondolier skimming up leaves in pool.

Employee of the Month Parking

'You're using 14' nails on a 2' door? This is definitely a case where bigger is not better.'

Not much money, glory, or praise

Home De-Po. Things you need for your project. Things you didn't know you needed until you were halfway through your project.

'Well, that's fixed that.'

Lifesaver!

George is pleased with himself. He replaced the toilet seat without calling a plumber.

'I said, you're supposed to be in the underworld.'

Lazy plumber.

It became increasingly difficult for the captain to reward his crew and still maintain his ferocious reputation.

Clearing the castle's moat.

"I fixed your leaky tap and the oven door... but there's nothing I can do with that dodgy seal on the fridge!"

"All right, pal, I'm just saying, that's what I'd do if it was my Large Hadron Collider."

Painter removes 'wet paint' sign from park bench and replaces it with a 'dry paint' sign.

Time Clock

"Okay, I fixed the leaking roof, and I moved the couch over to the far wall, but I'm sorry, I don't unblock toilets!"

'No it's still not fixed'

A plumber preparing to go under a house's dark crawl space sees many eyes looking back from the darkness.

'Day two at the...brain transplant institute.'

'If you could roll up your sleeves, go behind the screen and plaster the wall.'

Met Office: Wet today and dry tomorrow.

"If you need anything in the building, just call the super. This is the only known photo of him."

'I work at the airport.'