Maintenance Master Gifts

"Isn't this the season for you to regret not winterizing the lawnmower last fall?"

'The problem's too simple - call someone else'

George is pleased with himself. He replaced the toilet seat without calling a plumber.

"No, your laptop turning red isn't a new, cool feature. It's red because it's hot. When is the last time you cleaned it?"

Face painting.

"I finally found a use for that old home repair book..."

'I'm sorry but I'm afraid the corporation is going in a different direction.'

'Lion Tamer experience hey? Well, I have a project currently needing your management skills...'

"What makes you think I'm dripping it on my shirt?"

The witch of the west again showed no water usage for the month.

"He loves his leaf blower."

'I'm going to practice on you before I start managing other people.'

Gondolier skimming up leaves in pool.

'At least he isn't into drugs.'

Congratulations on your retirement!

'You're using 14' nails on a 2' door? This is definitely a case where bigger is not better.'

Janey then realized that babysitting isn't easy...

Not much money, glory, or praise

'I think what we need now is someone called a computer programmer.'

"I was ironing the curtains and fell out of the window..!"

'Told you to get your mower fixed.'

"This is bad work, Edwards! Bad! Bad! Bad! Bad!"

'I can't get out! -- I lost the owner's manual!'

'Well, that's fixed that.'

Traffic Management Strategic Group

'It may not be your feng shui, but it's my feng shui.'

"I fixed your leaky tap and the oven door... but there's nothing I can do with that dodgy seal on the fridge!"

Clearing the castle's moat.

'This is my natural habitat.'

Institute for Artificial Intelligence.

'Happy now?'

Hats: Management/Good Job/Friendly but Aloof.

Project Manager Showdown

"All right, pal, I'm just saying, that's what I'd do if it was my Large Hadron Collider."

A plumber preparing to go under a house's dark crawl space sees many eyes looking back from the darkness.