Laugh-loving Entrepreneurs Gifts

"If you give me £1.00, I'll get him to eat your homework for you."

"Just remember if we don't enjoy it we can claim it as a tax-deductible business meeting..."

"Well, sure. We could hire some Temps, but they only live about ten days."

'You're right...these are your hormone pills. Thank goodness we noticed before anything serious happened.'

"Would you describe the pain everyone else causes you as dull and throbbing or sharp like a knife?"

Minutes Later The Course Of Comedy Would Be Changed Forever.

'I hired a motivational speaker once, but unfortunately all of my employees left to get better jobs.'

Shareholder's Meetings

People often have us confused with investment bankers. We loot and plunder, leaving a mess wherever we go, and when there are complaints we claim endangered species status.

'Then someone hit on the idea of selling our torture devices to fitness centers.'

"Members of the board, my indecision is final."

Tragedy and Material

'As you both know, here at Frump, Cuttle and Howsen, failure is not an option, so that only leaves blame.'

Stan's OK Deliveries

"Relax. We're market fundamentalists."

"Open mike night"

Street person selling bricks from wall he's leaning on.

"It's weeder's elbow."

Security Alert in the Paperless Office. . . .

'It's the final step in the merger...deciding which of the will be CEO.'

"Generics of generics -- that's the way we'll go."

"Today the secret ingredients for Mom's Apple Pie were sold to the Japanese for sixty-eight million dollars."

Cow selling milk from small roadside stand.

"On a scale of 1 to 10, how would you rate our product?"

"If I ever get my own business, I'm going to practice the Golden Rule."

"Oh, no. I brought my dinner plans by mistake."

'Chief, thanks again for that little 'self-starter' talk followed by a mild electric shock.'

'They're looking for the bottom line.'

Actually, I'm not Mr. Weintraub. I'm just, sort of, taking over for awhile."

"It's only panic alarm system... it goes off every time management suggest another reorganisation."

'He'll not be writing any more quick-fire gags now he's crawling along at that speed, eh, Ern?'

Feces on a stick (huge street vender fly selling shit)

Your name written in the snow $1

Cartoonist Thinking Whilst His Pencil Snoozes.

Lemonade Stand: We Don't Pee In Ourz