Laugh-loving Entrepreneurs Pillows

"If you give me £1.00, I'll get him to eat your homework for you."

'...and so you see our profits, not unlike Sir Isaac Newton, have felt the effects of gravity.'

"Just remember if we don't enjoy it we can claim it as a tax-deductible business meeting..."

"Well, sure. We could hire some Temps, but they only live about ten days."

'You're right...these are your hormone pills. Thank goodness we noticed before anything serious happened.'

"Would you describe the pain everyone else causes you as dull and throbbing or sharp like a knife?"

Minutes Later The Course Of Comedy Would Be Changed Forever.

'I hired a motivational speaker once, but unfortunately all of my employees left to get better jobs.'

Shareholder's Meetings

People often have us confused with investment bankers. We loot and plunder, leaving a mess wherever we go, and when there are complaints we claim endangered species status.

"Members of the board, my indecision is final."

'Then someone hit on the idea of selling our torture devices to fitness centers.'

Tragedy and Material

'As you both know, here at Frump, Cuttle and Howsen, failure is not an option, so that only leaves blame.'

Stan's OK Deliveries

"Relax. We're market fundamentalists."

Security Alert in the Paperless Office. . . .

"Open mike night"

"It's weeder's elbow."

Street person selling bricks from wall he's leaning on.

'It's the final step in the merger...deciding which of the will be CEO.'

"Generics of generics -- that's the way we'll go."

"Today the secret ingredients for Mom's Apple Pie were sold to the Japanese for sixty-eight million dollars."

Cow selling milk from small roadside stand.

'Chief, thanks again for that little 'self-starter' talk followed by a mild electric shock.'

"On a scale of 1 to 10, how would you rate our product?"

"If I ever get my own business, I'm going to practice the Golden Rule."

"Oh, no. I brought my dinner plans by mistake."

'They're looking for the bottom line.'

"It's only panic alarm system... it goes off every time management suggest another reorganisation."

Cartoonist Thinking Whilst His Pencil Snoozes.

Feces on a stick (huge street vender fly selling shit)

Actually, I'm not Mr. Weintraub. I'm just, sort of, taking over for awhile."

'He'll not be writing any more quick-fire gags now he's crawling along at that speed, eh, Ern?'

Your name written in the snow $1