Jailhouse Romantics Gifts

"Would you still love me if I wasn't a criminal?"

"The lettuce I paid with was fresher than the lettuce I bought."

Shakespeare in the clink

Prison Romance.

Prisoner Crossing

"One night in a moment of rage. . . I removed a 'Do Not Remove Under Penalty of Law' tag from a pillow!"

I was able to get you a 2-book deal.

"I had money problems- forged fivers the wrong colour!"

'I can't believe it! -- My own personal computer turned state's evidence!'

'Well, you're not acting like you have every confidence in me.'

'I was on 'AMERICA'S MOST WANTED', captured on 'COPS', tried on 'COURT TV' and sentenced to 10 years of basic cable.'

'Equal protection of the law, my foot! -- That was RANK discrimination against bank robbers!'

"Sorry I'm late, I had to do jail time."

"They weren't very friendly when they proscuted me for obtaining loans under false names."

'I got six months for arson, and ten years for failing to file an environmental impact statement.'

"Five to ten years of bad accordion music...OMG!"

Prison Paintings

'It's for you.'

'My first counterfeit dollar.'

'True, you've been assigned a nobody lawyer but you're a nobody criminal!'

At least you have security!

Cartoonist draws bomb next to prisoner.

'I got life plus three hundred years...I won't be eligible for parole for six months...'

'If I've told you once, I've told you a thousand times -- Bank robbers don't need business cards!'

"Apparently it's OK to clone sheep but not hundred-dollar bills"

"You should never smuggle a phone in without first switching off 'vibrate'."

I think I'll holiday at home this year!'

'It's amazing the change in his attitude since he took up knitting.'

"See you later. Do you want the door closed?'

And for sport we've goot a spittoon.

"They say you're good with forgeries?"