Humorous Driver Gifts

Bug on the windshield.

Installing one of the new 'Buck Bridges' reduced Bob's auto insurance by 21%.

Man driving in tree to wife: 'I think we're lost.'

Right lane ends 500 feet. . .Cheer up - it begins again 3 miles.

"I need to tinkle."

'Well, the good news is; You won't need to tax and insure it.'

"Good evening, sir, may I see your drinking licence please?"

'It's a Volksvegan...it runs on vegetable oil!'

I break for toilet paper

Kick-line Deer Crossing. A kick-line of deer cross the road Radio City Rockettes style.

'Beware of SUV.'

Moses comes to Los Angeles.

If a motorist came bursting through the doors...would he be up for damages?

'Congratulations. You've passed.'

'If I were you, I'd leave the keys in the ignition and hope someone steals it.'

'Would you watch where you're going already.'

Danger: Reading warning signs costs lives.

Ducks crossing.

Australian Sat Nav - 'Straight on mate'.

Speed Checked By Radar.

"How about a self-inflating-a-flat-tire car?"

'Why can't you ride under the dash like other airbags?'

"I've caught you not stopping at a red light."

Driver with a rear view mirror attached to his forehead.

Shouldn't you clean the windscreen?

'This model runs on antibiotics.'

I brake for elves.

"Check your mirrors. Signal before pulling into traffic. And watch that lead foot!"

'Surely you can't book me for laughing, officer'

"Could we try parking again please, Mr. Zog?"

The Magician world's version of Fluffy dice.

'I've been glamped!'

It's just until I stop chasing cars.

'Until 1989 I never had an accident...then I bought a car.'

'Guess what? I'm going to be on 'World's Worst Drivers'!'