Humorist In The Face Of Thaw Gifts

'What matter an inch or two of surface-water, if the ice be still sound undernaeth!'

"All natural snow cones for sale."

"Try picking up a girl after you've renounced everything."

"Your tires are spinning and you're stuck."

I don't know what happened to the poor guy, but he's visibly shaken.

"How come we never have 'Baked Alaska'?"

I made snow angels in my good clothes and mom gave me the devil for it!

The new green legislature requires methane mitigation.

'YOU are fed up with it . . . How do you think I feel?'

'There, that should freak 'em out.'

"Good lord, Billingsworth. You've stumbled onto the legendary Lepidopterist Graveyard."

'It's easy, just wee!'

"Everytime you touch me, I get frostbite!"

"If there is a heaven, why do we end up as fossil fuel?"

"I love this time of year."

'I don't get it. They told me to serve merlot at room temperature.'

"It looks like it's an eye bank."

"I'll admit I've packed on a few extra pounds, but it's only water weight."

'I bought winter tyres and it didn't snow.'

Weather today.

A diuretic! Are you sure about this?

"Don't think of it as getting fired. Think of it as finally being recognized for your incompetence."

"Aw, geez. My nuts are frozen." "T-T-Tell me about it."

"Oh no, Doris. . . not implants!"

Greco-polar wrestling

"I think, therefore I am depressed."

"I told you we came back too early...I'm freezing my tail feathers off!"

'I see a lot of that at this time of year...you've got a nasty case of cabin fever!'

"This heat transfer dance had better work. I'm freezing my tail off!"

Med. Soc Sec. Can we agree on anything to reduce the deficit other than a bake sale?

'Where is the global warming when you want it?'

Plant Closed - Downsized Too Far

'Van Helsing, I've told you that just Holy Water isn't enough to kill count Snowcula! You need HOT Holy Water!'

A dead Olive found stabbed, in a Cocktail drink

'Another botched Snotox injection...'