Cold Climate Humorists Gifts

'What do you mean, you want rollerblades?'

Ice Bar Conversations

"All natural snow cones for sale."

'What do you like about winter? I like these crisp, cold morning walks in the glistening snow.' 'I like how you can keep your extra beer outside.'

'The bank says they're freezing my assets! I don't understand: They've always been frozen...'

"How come we never have 'Baked Alaska'?"

'YOU are fed up with it . . . How do you think I feel?'

'I don't get it. They told me to serve merlot at room temperature.'

"Everytime you touch me, I get frostbite!"

"I love this time of year."

Dr B orge tests his new cow-fart ozone depletion meter.

"It looks like it's an eye bank."

Weather today.

'Be fair, George - how do you expect me to find your contact lens in this lot?'

Greco-polar wrestling

'I see a lot of that at this time of year...you've got a nasty case of cabin fever!'

"This heat transfer dance had better work. I'm freezing my tail off!"

"Normally, applying heat would be the correct therapy, however..."

'Where is the global warming when you want it?'

Minnesota Weather.

"You'll have to have it neat, sir. We're running out of ice."

"Is it safe to come out yet?"

'What's Iggy doing home from school at this time of day?'

Need to turn up heat(fish crowd heater in aquirium).

My tail's cold.

"...heat escapes through your head. Lose the hat and you might make it through April"

Eskimo Breaking Wind

Uninhabital USA.

'This should shake things up -- I've just found conclusive evidence that global warming is caused by whales!'

"Now we know what happens when we overachieve the climate goals."

'Unusual weather for June'

To Antarctica

'I'd take that with a pinch of salt if I thought the council could spare any.'

"Put on a top hat and scarf. You'll freeze your carrot off!"

"CCCOOOLD!"