Horticulture Humorists Gifts

'Grow you son of a bitch!'

Prize vegetables.

The Busy Gardener

'If I had known it was going to be such a late Spring, i would have never started my garden seeds, indoors.'

'Make sure you pretend to water it.'

Gardener attacked by plants.

Something Wilted This Way Comes.

Gardener clipping topiary stairs

"Cheery little flowers, saying good night, saying good morning!"

"We really need more perennials? Aren't my weeds and crabgrass enough?"

Don't forget the hosepipe ban!

Gardener

Doing the borders.

Dear Santa, please can I have a powerful herbicide for Christmas. Best wishes, Adam.

'We use to tiptoe through the tulips. . . now we just waddle through the weeds.'

Plants Cheer as They Get Watered.

"Usually gardeners only have green thumbs, so you must really spend a lot of time in the garden."

"Looks like we grafted a few too many human genes into the kohlrabi."

'I had a wonderful garden last year. Bark beetles, aphids, mealy worms, thripes, wax seal, gray mold, and grubs!'

Florabation - '..mmm...It must be spring!'

Rose Garden

'You wouldn't happen to be sitting on my entry to the straightest runner bean competition?'

Horti-Culture

Gardener Cutting Tree into 'Rock' Symbol.

'You must be Jim's new gardener. I'm his neighbour, Gerald. Had any luck with the Petunias this year? Aren't those Jim's feet sticking out of the ornamental pond?'

Garden Shop - Top Soil, Bottom Soil (manure)

Garden Goddess.

'Esther, is it possible, just possible mind you, that your green thumb has gone berserk?'

Garden.

Award Winning Gardener

"I'm losing my patience with you."

"It can't be much of a life working all day, but at least he gets to wear a stripey jersey."

An old man growing berries

"Fred, I think you're spending altogether too much time down here with these mushrooms!"