Hollywood Skeptics Pillows

"Well, you can't say they didn't warn us."

"The moral of the story, honey, is that being a celebrity does not make you a credible children’s book author."

'So no animals were harmed in that movie...but how about the audience?!'

Moby Dick the Demi Moore Version

For richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health for a full 13 episodes...?

"Call my attorney and say that I killed Ted in self-defense. Call my publicist and say that I wish Ted the best of luck in all his future endeavors."

"Please, no more movies about feelings."

"What you ain't - is A GENT!"

"I hate these walkabouts. Did you remember to get me some corn plasters?"

"Is there a discount for someone who doesn't want to see the movie?"

Warning! The next programme contains no celebrities.

"Enough with the hard-luck stories about spanking and cursive and appointment television, Dad."

"I'm not a fan of biblical movies."

"That movie was released in 2015. It might be time for a reboot."

'We'd like to return it. There wasn't any on-screen chemistry between us.'

Celebrity Autobiography...

'She looks good because it's not natural. It's all plastic.'

The Sequel is Coming

Lonely Trump Rally in Tulsa

'We spend a fortune on a big screen and he watches everything on his phone!'

Numb and Number.

24 ? The Next Series. Jack says: 'Think I'll throw a sickie today.'

"I'm sorry, but I can't commit to a full movie."

'I like to keep up-to-date with the movies I'll be hating next year.'

"Oh no, not another comedy clips with celebs pretending it's funny!"