Film Skeptic Pillows

"Please, no more movies about feelings."

"Why don't we switch off the news and give Brexit up for Lent?"

Studies show foods work miracles!

CIA report

"Actually, yes, honey — I do believe 'Fox News' is an oxymoron."

Why do you hate the media?

'So no animals were harmed in that movie...but how about the audience?!'

'I don't like reading on screen, so I'm printing the internet to look at it later.'

Classic News.

"According to my phone, society is on the brink of collapse, but, according to our living room, things seem pretty O.K."

"This just in: you thought joy was within reach, but you were wrong."

You're on, caller. What's your problem?! The Oscars were so very, very boring. You decided to sit in front of your tv for four hours watching rich people give themselves awards. YOU DON'T DESERVE TO BE ENTERTAINED, LOSER! They're coming out with a new show called "Watching Celebrities Cash Their Checks." You'd probably enjoy that. Get professionally berated at asksadie@rudypark.com.

"Climate change is not real. It's fake climate!"

"Now remember...no lies about the government...only lies from the government."

Time for today's dose of emotional manipulation...

The following story is based on actual events.

No Unknown Unknowns

Newspaper headlines - Butters kills, Margarine kills.

"Paparazzi!"

"I'm doing a Kickstopper project!" "What?" "I was going to write a book... but do we really need another book in this world? So... Kickstopper—people donate money to stop me from writing. I won't write it so I'll never ask you to read it. I'd pay money to not read your book. Thanks." "You're welcome." "I'm also starting projects to not start a band, not write poetry and not tell you about my dreams."

At the 'Feel Good' movie of the year.

These networks are definitely treating news as entertainment, but I'm not sure if they're going for drama or comedy.

'...No, he can't really fly...no, the bad guys don't really have a gun...no this cereal really isn't the best food in the whole world...no, it won't make you as strong as a giant...'

"When I die, I want to come back at anything except a book of short stories."

Summertime Blues

"What do the know!"

"None of this news seems 'fit to print' to me!"

'The story you are about to see is as true as most of the stuff you get on televison these days....'

"Two directors, three adaptations plus 3-D, and they STILL screw it up!"

'A new poll reveals that 75 percent of fox news viewers believe there are death panels in the health care bill and 75 percent of Disney channel viewers believe elephants can fly.'

Couple watches the news, seeing 'News, Fake News, Weather, and Sports'.

'The following program isn't really recommended for anybody, but hey — ratings are ratings!'

'Today the nation's highly reliable sources were replaced by 'sometimes reliable sources'.'

"I can’t decide who I despise more — the politicians or the media."

"But you really can't trust the media."