Green Comedians Gifts

Recycled humor.

Striving to reduce our dependence on fossil fuels, scientists attempt to harness the energy of a toddler's tantrum.

"Hi there! - I'm the world's first eco-friendly comedian... All My Jokes Are Recycled...!"

'It's not easy being green on grass!'

Look! Up in the sky! It's absurd! It's inane! It's Malaprop Man! Malaprop Man, I hear you're fighting climate change now. Yes starting with solo panels, I'm reducing greenhouse guesses! I'm investing in buttery technology. I'm going to have windmeals. And of course, I've stopped drinking cola. Why is that? I'll have a smaller carbonated footprint!

"Can I get this to go in an organic, locally recycled, eco-friendly doggie bag?"

'But Honey, if we have kids, we won't be endangered anymore: We will lose all the social benefits and attention...'

Climate Conference. I'm glad you enjoyed my speech, but please don't call it the "high-water mark."

"Of course I care about the environment, I never throw any clothes away."

Where's my global warming?

"Brilliant! And then all they have to do is stop them flying at night."

'So there's global warming. What possible harm could it do?'

'I'd say that our transport policy couldn't get any greener'

Shipwrecked with an environmentalist.

'Right, you peck his left paw, I'll go for the right one.'

"You're not helping the methane problem, you know."

Paper Bath Towels.

Will work for manure.

igloo smoking zone...

'It's a very common plant on earth.'

"Hide? What do you mean hide? We are literally camouflage and they still eat us!"

"The water feature doubles as a plunge pool."

"There's no such thing as a vegan flytrap."

Climate-Conscious Cartoonists Work Without Paper!

Recycle your problems. Many of our neuroses, hang-ups and character defects can be re-used by others.

"As part of the new environmental policy management want us to introduce a paperless office, and this is how they want us to do it."

'What kind of mileage do you get?'

'How can anyone say our factory isn't green? Most of our waste is that colour!'

"The idea is simple. You pay us money and all your sins disappear! It's just like purchasing carbon offsets."

"This material is 80% recycled."

'Sorry Charles, but according to my GPS-receiver, I'm still in my own territory...'

'If it'll make you any happier, we're biodegradable, too.'

Now, this is a good garden: full of weeds! The likelyhood of somebody trying to poison us here is very low...

Acmeville welcomes you to leave your carbon footprint here.

Despite the abundance of giant corks on the frontier, zero emission vehicles never caught on in the Old West.