Giving Birth Gifts

'I've had so many caesareans, I've got a zip.'

'This app helps during labor by shouting very creative incentives and demands for retribution.'

Chicken just laid huge egg.

'Are you sure it's not out of your way?'

Birth Cake

It's a girl! It's a mom!

Obstetrics.

'You came through the delivery with flying colors, Mrs. Lewis.'

"Fetch a kitten instead."

Entering Maternity ward where the door sign says 'Push, Push, Push'.

'I'm afraid we can't deliver your baby until your CRB check comes through.'

Push! PUSH! ...No not you nurse!

Young Frank Lloyd Wright

"And the last little piggy cried, 'Oui, oui, oui' all the way home."

"Bond James, Bond."

'Sometimes I worry that I basically wasted my 2's.'

'Einstein, the children are getting too complex for me.'

"I know what this is, it's what mum and dad call 'working from home'...

"I can't protect you from everything, but I can read you stories that make you believe I can protect you from everything."

Cry babies.

Baby Piano

My First Camera

'OK, now let's be careful out there.'

The cell phone soother for life.

"I only travelled with my umbilical cord!"

A midwife holding a baby

Fat Kid 10- Eats an ice-cream

'Don't worry. It's never too hot or never too cold.'

"I said he's beginning to teethe...not tithe."

"That's not how I sat on you."

"He's not talking yet, but sometimes we give him peanut butter to make it look like he is."

"Congratulations, it's a lifetime of penury and countless sleepless nights!"

'He has your nose and my ears.'

"No, I don’t find it funny that her first words are ‘South Park’!"

Gifts for a cloned baby!