Fishy Humor Aficionado Gifts

"We've ruled out Islamophobia and Homophobia. Let's turn to food phobias. How do you feel about Tilapia?"

'Don't worry, Alice. I won't leave you.'

Fish Baptism is by full emersion

Fisherman pulling out hook with sign on it saying 'Gone Swimmin'.

Prawn Shop

'Steroids.'

"How long can you stay out here before your toes wrinkle?"

"Fear of getting caught is understandable, but I think your fear of water requires pharmaceutical intervention."

'That's the last time I send you shopping!'

Fishing Holes

The evolution of synchronizes swimmers.

'Yes we are observing the swordfish boycott, but we brought in special herring with nose jobs.'

'My advice? Dump him! There are plenty more fish in the sea...'

"You son of a b***h! I know where thos ebubbles are coming from!"

Fish "Hey Kid, got a light?"

"Just ignore them. They're summer people."

"Good. I was hoping for someone who could talk under water!"

Chez Ernie. Freezer. You still can't call it "freshly caught," Ernie.

How evolution was inspired by children

Fisherman.

"Oh, great... they say they all have headaches."

Take two of these with a glass of air.

"Just the bait, please."

"It's a chatter bait."

"Put that away. You know there's no texting in school."

"Offishial business, ma'am."

'Like they say, 'give a man a fish, he can eat for a day. Give him a fish store, he can go bankrupt.'

'Listen, yes, I'm an hermit, but a simple Hermit-Crab: I do not answer philosophical questions!'

'Get lost, two's company, three's a shoal.'

The Submarine and the Fisherman

'...a little higher and to the right.'

Fish with Human Trophy

Fire Exit

I told you not to eat that Blowfish.

'Gimme your wallet! I've got a salmon, and it's farmed'