Fish Humor Aficionado Gifts

"I forget which one of us is the therapist."

'Don't worry, Alice. I won't leave you.'

Fish Baptism is by full emersion

Fisherman pulling out hook with sign on it saying 'Gone Swimmin'.

"How long can you stay out here before your toes wrinkle?"

Prawn Shop

'Steroids.'

"Fear of getting caught is understandable, but I think your fear of water requires pharmaceutical intervention."

The evolution of synchronizes swimmers.

Fishing Holes

'Yes we are observing the swordfish boycott, but we brought in special herring with nose jobs.'

'My advice? Dump him! There are plenty more fish in the sea...'

"Just ignore them. They're summer people."

"We've ruled out Islamophobia and Homophobia. Let's turn to food phobias. How do you feel about Tilapia?"

"Don't worry, I quite enjoy a fishy breath: Now, open wide..."

"Good. I was hoping for someone who could talk under water!"

Chez Ernie. Freezer. You still can't call it "freshly caught," Ernie.

"You son of a b***h! I know where thos ebubbles are coming from!"

Fish "Hey Kid, got a light?"

How evolution was inspired by children

Fisherman.

"Offishial business, ma'am."

'Like they say, 'give a man a fish, he can eat for a day. Give him a fish store, he can go bankrupt.'

"Just the bait, please."

"Put that away. You know there's no texting in school."

"Oh, great... they say they all have headaches."

Take two of these with a glass of air.

'Get lost, two's company, three's a shoal.'

The Submarine and the Fisherman

'...a little higher and to the right.'

Fire Exit

I told you not to eat that Blowfish.

Putting on ice

'Gimme your wallet! I've got a salmon, and it's farmed'

"And that's why there aren't any fish comedians."