Fish Humor Enthusiast Gifts

Fire Exit

'Don't worry, Alice. I won't leave you.'

Fish Baptism is by full emersion

'What did the fish say when he swam into the wall?'

Fisherman pulling out hook with sign on it saying 'Gone Swimmin'.

"How long can you stay out here before your toes wrinkle?"

'Steroids.'

"Fear of getting caught is understandable, but I think your fear of water requires pharmaceutical intervention."

Fishing Holes

The evolution of synchronizes swimmers.

'My advice? Dump him! There are plenty more fish in the sea...'

Fish "Hey Kid, got a light?"

"Don't worry, I quite enjoy a fishy breath: Now, open wide..."

"You son of a b***h! I know where thos ebubbles are coming from!"

Chez Ernie. Freezer. You still can't call it "freshly caught," Ernie.

"Good. I was hoping for someone who could talk under water!"

"We've ruled out Islamophobia and Homophobia. Let's turn to food phobias. How do you feel about Tilapia?"

"Just ignore them. They're summer people."

How evolution was inspired by children

Take two of these with a glass of air.

"Put that away. You know there's no texting in school."

"Offishial business, ma'am."

'Like they say, 'give a man a fish, he can eat for a day. Give him a fish store, he can go bankrupt.'

"Oh, great... they say they all have headaches."

'Get lost, two's company, three's a shoal.'

'Gimme your wallet! I've got a salmon, and it's farmed'

"And that's why there aren't any fish comedians."

Fish with Human Trophy

Putting on ice

I told you not to eat that Blowfish.

"Seriously, you have to stop getting up in the middle of the night to get a glass of water."

'And why is liquidity so important to you?'

Fishing from a Fish

"My memory is awful, so stop me if I've told this one before."

Fish with human trophy on wall.