Fishy Humorist Gifts

Fisherman.

"I don't know. I guess you mount it on the back of your car."

"Just the bait, please."

'This aquarium has sections for salt water, fresh water and carbonated bottled water.'

The Submarine and the Fisherman

'...a little higher and to the right.'

'Yes,my last name is bass,and no my first name is not bigmouth.'

'Yes we are observing the swordfish boycott, but we brought in special herring with nose jobs.'

"It's hard to breath wearing a mask."

reincarnated worm...

Christmas in the Fish Bowl

"I knew we should have gotten the shorter tree."

'Don't worry, Alice. I won't leave you.'

Guide fish.

That dolphin drinks like a fish.

'The trick to scaring surfers is to only show your dorsal fin when you surface next to them...'

Shark Chum

Fish Farm.

'Steroids.'

"I have to go on a diet! According to that fisherman I have gained fifty pounds overnight!!"

"Of course I'm self-absorbed. I'm a sponge!"

'Have you ever wondered how deep the ocean would be without sponges?'

How Lawyers Evolved.

Need to turn up heat(fish crowd heater in aquirium).

'That's the last time I send you shopping!'

"No, actually I am a large mouth tenor."

'You see these things, you don't bite them, you suck them out...'

'I'm a Pisces.'

Acme Coffee Co.

'Oh no, he's only the Health and Safety Officer.'

'I wonder why goldfish are gold.' - 'So they don't rust.'

"You see, if we learn to swim upside down, they won't see us coming..."

"Just ignore them. They're summer people."

'Sperm Donor Whale.'

Fisherman catches a mine.