Dryers Gifts

"Consider yourself lucky that you only got a little shaken up in that dryer--socks get lost in that thing and aren't ever seen again.'

"The good old days of eating the washing off the line are all gone methinks: The farmer has bought an electric dryer..."

Moses separating his Laundry.

"The dryer giveth and the dryer taketh away."

The Missing Sock Returns

Santa Claus's wife beats the soot out of his beard.

"What makes you think I'm dripping it on my shirt?"

"Drunk, yet orderly"

'Before you come with me, tell me...does this robe look a little rumpled to you? I don't think the dry cleaners got the creases out, do you?'

A man washing a mascot costume

Instructions for Bow Tie Wearers

"I like you in that one—it gives you an aura of mindfulness."

"It's a smart hamper that sucks up clothes. My mom claims I leave my clothes on the floor, so she has it follow me wherever I go."

"You know the stories about putting a pair of socks into the washing machine and getting out just one of them...Jones, it seems that we found the hideaway of the second socks!"

The wooden clothes horse of Troy.

Arms reach through a mirror to straighten a man's bow tie.

"I feel like tearing of all your clothes and putting them in the washing machine."

'I'll take it!'

Dreams I have had...

Sheep In Curlers

"So that's where all the socks ended up!"

Cat mistakes bars for toilets.

"Like you, I was lost...then I found Jesus!"

"Damn. These must have shrunk in the wash." "I don't think so."

Help! (Woman stuck on washing line).

"Wait, you never wash your cape?"

Savory Types

Fashion Update Dryer Sheets

"Since we installed the video surveillance system we're losing fewer socks."

Santa's wash day.

"To be joined together as a matched pair, in cleanliness and in filth, until separation in the laundry do you part?"

'Whenever Mat gets a little over-confident, I tell him to try to fold a fitted bed sheet.'

"Yes, they come out white than white, but when they went in they were blue."

"And do you, Scott, take Amy, to have and to hold, in sickness and in health, through mysterious separations of indefinite duration, as long as you both may live?"

"I'm making him take a spin class."