Dinner Disaster Survivor Gifts

"Is this dinner or the effects of global warming?"

'Dinner will be ready soon -- the submarine sandwiches are soaking now.'

"I have no idea what, hic, went wrong. I did everything, hic, Mario Batali said."

Snow & Flo series: Questionable cooking.

'My hero!'

"Dad's dinner really is melt-in-your-mouth...it's half frozen!"

"Do you want ketchup on your steak too?"

"Don't panic, she'll be back. We lock the washroom windows from the outside."

Okay, let me guess...we're eating baked ham and meat loaf on a bed of fish sticks because you combined all the leftovers...

"You've actually done something even Gordon Ramsay can't do-burn the salad!"

"The scallops were delicious, but the fork was dismal!"

"The dinner date was a disaster! I realised he was still a "Mama's Boy" when I saw he was expecting me to regurgitate his food..."

"I hope you like smoked salmon."

"He cooks under the guidance of a smoke alarm."

"Do you mind if your soup is a bit crunchy?"

'Please stand by. We have temporary loss of your roast.'

'Today was a bit of a disaster.' - 'First I cut my finger and bled everywhere, then I lost my plaster while I was cooking.' - 'Do you want the last bowl of pumpkin soup?' - 'No, it's okay. You go for it.'

"I never use the oven timer. The smoke alarms are louder."

'No, everything is not all right. My date ran out without leaving money to pay the bill!'

Chinese restaurant: In case of emergency break glass (Knife and fork).

'Andy STILL hasn't got the hang of spaghetti..'

'Call an emergency church supper! The freezer's gone out!'

Sneezing dragon.

'Stop complaining or I'll take you home and serve you some of my husband's cooking!'

"There's been an accident in the kitchen." "I know, I've just eaten it."

"I can hear the smoke alarm.Is dinner ready?"

'Here we put the emphasis exclusively on the food!'

'Tell Luigi to be a lottle more careful with the pepper.'

''Honey!...Have you seen the brussel sprout casserole I made for dinner tonight?'

"Could Doctor see him now-I have the dinner to cook."

"I'm sorry, the sesame peanut dressing is not agreeing with him."

"How is everything?"

"Apparently after your fifth bout of food poisoning they suggest you take one home."

Murphy's Slaw.

"Gesundheit!"