Dinner Disaster Survivor Pillows

"Is this dinner or the effects of global warming?"

'Dinner will be ready soon -- the submarine sandwiches are soaking now.'

'By the time I'd watched Delia and Ainsley and Jamie Oliver and Floyd...I'd spoiled the broth.'

"I have no idea what, hic, went wrong. I did everything, hic, Mario Batali said."

Snow & Flo series: Questionable cooking.

'My hero!'

"Dad's dinner really is melt-in-your-mouth...it's half frozen!"

"Do you want ketchup on your steak too?"

"Don't panic, she'll be back. We lock the washroom windows from the outside."

'I'm sorry we put bearnaise sauce on your fillet by mistake. Randy will have it off there in a jiffy.'

Okay, let me guess...we're eating baked ham and meat loaf on a bed of fish sticks because you combined all the leftovers...

"The scallops were delicious, but the fork was dismal!"

"You've actually done something even Gordon Ramsay can't do-burn the salad!"

"Just keep your eyes closed - it'll only upset you."

"The dinner date was a disaster! I realised he was still a "Mama's Boy" when I saw he was expecting me to regurgitate his food..."

"I hope you like smoked salmon."

"He cooks under the guidance of a smoke alarm."

"Do you mind if your soup is a bit crunchy?"

Chinese restaurant: In case of emergency break glass (Knife and fork).

'Please stand by. We have temporary loss of your roast.'

'Andy STILL hasn't got the hang of spaghetti..'

'No, everything is not all right. My date ran out without leaving money to pay the bill!'

'Today was a bit of a disaster.' - 'First I cut my finger and bled everywhere, then I lost my plaster while I was cooking.' - 'Do you want the last bowl of pumpkin soup?' - 'No, it's okay. You go for it.'

"I never use the oven timer. The smoke alarms are louder."

'Call an emergency church supper! The freezer's gone out!'

Sneezing dragon.

'Stop complaining or I'll take you home and serve you some of my husband's cooking!'

"I can hear the smoke alarm.Is dinner ready?"

"There's been an accident in the kitchen." "I know, I've just eaten it."

'Here we put the emphasis exclusively on the food!'

'Tell Luigi to be a lottle more careful with the pepper.'

''Honey!...Have you seen the brussel sprout casserole I made for dinner tonight?'

"Could Doctor see him now-I have the dinner to cook."

"Apparently after your fifth bout of food poisoning they suggest you take one home."

"Gesundheit!"