Dining Drama Gifts

'Trouble cutting pickled onions.'

"How was the food sir?"

"Yes I know, and you dropped sauce on your shirt."

'Stop him, he's got the receipe.' Duck running away

"I'm not trying to freak you out, but your eel roll is moving."

'We'll get our food....eventually.'

'The tax and tip I understand, but what's this charge for shipping and handling?'

'I'm afraid the Chef's Surprise today is that he ran off with one of the waitresses.'

Waiter: 'Your Tossed salad Ma'am.'

"House red, sir?"

'So, not your favourite restuarant anymore...'

'I hear there's a fly in your soup?'

'Macaroni and cheese, three nights in a row?... That's justifiable homicide in my book!'

"What will change my life?"

"Hi again. Can I just check whether you enjoyed me interrupting your meal five minutes ago to ask whether you were enjoying your meal?"

"Waiter, there's a fly in my soup, and ironically, there's also a crouton in my s**t."

"Waiter - this dish doesn't contain enough adjectives..!"

"How's everything?"

Now squeeze sharply five times - that should dislodge the tip from his coat pocket.

"Good evening, my name is Hank. I'm your waiter tonight. This is Eddy, he is our cooks' lawyer."

"Slop again?!"

"Quick! Tiptoe out and phone the Fire Service!"

"Here are Monsieur Limace, our sommelier, Monsiere Juron, chef de Cuisine and Mr Kruigshenk, specialist for the beheading of breakfast eggs."

'A fly in your soup, eh? -- Call me if it gets any worse.'

"We're all dying to try something that you set on fire at our table."

"There, dammit. Is that enough pepper for you??"

"Dear God, noooooo oooo!" "The Oreo tragedy"

'You did ask for the wine steward - now grovel, man, grovel!'

'Careful, this plate may be a little hot.'

Fly at the tennis club cafe.

'If you're in a hurry, why did you order the snails?'

'Can you send this back to the kitchen. It's cold.'

'Oh,do grow up - dinner wasn't that late.'

A gentleman and his butler in a dining room.

"Oh God, I forgot to ask if anybody had lard issues."