Cubicle Strategist Gifts

"We need to reorganize. Harris, switch seats with Miss Olsen."

"Mr. Mott, may I remind you that the success of this company has been largely due to our attention to detail."

"I'd like your honest, unbiased and possibly career-ending opinion on something."

"You're nobody's fool but you're not too smart for you own good, either."

'Monica, you're always such an island of calm in the company. How do you do it?' 'Well, the economy helps some with that.'

'By the time I get to greener pastures, my lawn mower will be worn out,'

'The office politics are getting worse -- there was an assassination attempt today.'

'Yo, my secondary man!' Damn ??" used to be his main man.

Redundancy cuts

"When I want your advice, I'll ask for it... but in an oblique, face-saving way."

A paperwork machine spews endless paperwork

"This position has become very important to the company."

Overworked in the office

40 Days without an on-the-job conversation.

Another day at work would be one too many...

"There are no big jobs, only small machines."

"Lost my job. But I'm pretty sure it's around here somewhere."

'It's 930am ma'am - time to meet the Board of Detractors.'

Like many of those in tribicles, Mitch dreamed of one day moving up to the real deal.

"Just heading out for a good cry, care to join me?"

"You knew this was a soul-sucking job when you took it."

Man at desk has a desk tray labeled "In one ear,' and another labeled "Out the other."

Work Slave

"How was my day? I'm still calculating the little victories minus the humiliations I normally suffer."

'Parsloe, your desk is blocking the corporate food chain.'

'He takes his organization chart seriously.'

"Brandon isn't adapting well to the open office concept."

'On your marks. Get set. Go!' - 'Come on! Keep going! You can do it!' - 'Yay! You're 8 hours closer to the grave!' - 'Oh, God.'

"I tell you, it's a jungle out there!"

"Give a man a job, and he'll work all day. Teach a man to delegate, and he'll take the rest of the day off."

"Suppose you tell me why you want to be a faceless drone at Globatron Inc.?"

"I may be incompetent. But, if you fire me there'll be no one who knows less about this company than you."

"Of course I have a life. Not one worth living, mind you."

"Keep up the good work, whatever it is, whoever you are."

Do not think outside the box!