Cross-country Traveler Gifts

"I'm finally done celebrating the recent election."

'I've just travelled half-way across the country and you tell me he's escaped?'

A treasure map shows you all the roads without tolls.

'We must be 50,000 calories away from home by now.'

Welcome To New York City...Subject to the following conditions.

"Oh indeed I did: I went feral for a year when I was young. It taught me a lot about the world, but about myself too..."

-'but for a full English breakfast you can't beat Blackpool,sir.'

'Why can't you admit you're lost?'

"Yes, six to seven weeks is my life expectancy! Once I learned that, I thought, the hell with it, I'll stop working and start travelling..."

Desert Island Statue of Liberty.

'You want a quick read? How about this one: 'Memoirs of an Amnesic'?'

"Where’s your sense of Gothic romance?"

"I think our smart home is suffering from separation anxiety. It's following us."

'What did I tell you? There's always a catch to those bargain internet travel fares...'

Vaccination Passport

Easter Island is still a tourist site after the oceans rise due to global warming.

"Could you tilt the Earth just a bit more away from the light?"

YONDER...next 347 miles.

The Decline of Europe

"Valet park only"

"I'm going to patronize India for my gap year, where are you going?"

Citizen of the world.

'Next plane to Los Angeles is at 3.'

Snake Charmer's Snake on Strike.

'Calm down...it's probably just another mirage.'

Actualities - Killing time whilst waiting for the Exhibition to open

Fleeing Kabul

Redecorating Easter Island.

"All right, let's clam up, everybody. Here comes another expedition."

'Globalsiation risky? How d'you mean?'

'We like to spend 51 weeks of the year at our Florida holiday home...'

"And that's why you go on safari."

"The security scanner said I have exquisite feet."

"A ticket to the Munich Beerfest, please."