Road Traveler Gifts

Car Pools.

"I think our smart home is suffering from separation anxiety. It's following us."

Road sign: "Good Start, but you've still got a ways to go."

"The GPS works great, we have satellite TV installed, the Sirius stereo sounds fantastic and our every move is tracked by Qualcomm. But could you turn around? I left me iphone at the house. . ."

A treasure map shows you all the roads without tolls.

Steep Hill, Slippery When Wet, Watch for Cars Going Faster Than You.

Road sign: 'No Passing Zone... This, too, shall pass.'

"Oh indeed I did: I went feral for a year when I was young. It taught me a lot about the world, but about myself too..."

"Now you've seen the bust how about letting me see Naples?"

Kardiff.

Songs about Texas, next 1100 miles.

Caution: Driver Watching "Hard Copy"

"Yes, six to seven weeks is my life expectancy! Once I learned that, I thought, the hell with it, I'll stop working and start travelling..."

Cash Machines From Across the Land

'Do you know the way to San Jose without breaking into a Bacharach number?'

'You want a quick read? How about this one: 'Memoirs of an Amnesic'?'

Vaccination Passport

Yes, That Was The Exit

I always play the GPS through the backseat speakers. That's were I'm used to receiving instructions.

"Valet park only"

Remember, it's about the journey, not the destination. But sure, I'll keep an eye out for a rest area.

YONDER...next 347 miles.

'If the GPS has to tell you, 'No, we're not there yet' one more time...'

"No matter what, sleep when the bay sleeps."

GPS can still have a few bugs in the system.

Recalculating!

Lady to man in netted car: 'Stinkin' speed trap.'

What are you looking for in a college? A strong environmental program. Ok. Pick 4 or 5 we could visit. I've got 3 days for the trip. There's one in Ohio. Can do. One in Maine, Iowa and California. You need a good geography program. Here's another one. Where's St. Paul?

'Great job Zork, we're lost... you couldn't find Uranus with both hands and a flashlight!'

'Calm down...it's probably just another mirage.'

Billy strip: comic will make you sick.

Id/Ego/Superego.

You are now leaving Everything..."Well, now I've seen everything."

Vulture proclaims its love for highways.

'I think we have some stowaways.'