Country Road Traveler Gifts

'Mom, when will we be mooving?'

YONDER...next 347 miles.

It's a Whole Field of Paisley!

Road sign: 'No Passing Zone... This, too, shall pass.'

"What road do you want to dart across today?"

"Hello, son. I suppose chicken farming doesn't seem so bad now."

Amusement Park Fun (Country Style).

Walkers

"I think our smart home is suffering from separation anxiety. It's following us."

"I always forget how much louder they sound in the country."

Farmer and FIsherman

"This isn't the big city anymore, Jim. I'm the facilitator now."

"Valet park only"

'I'm studying the lay of the land..'

What are you looking for in a college? A strong environmental program. Ok. Pick 4 or 5 we could visit. I've got 3 days for the trip. There's one in Ohio. Can do. One in Maine, Iowa and California. You need a good geography program. Here's another one. Where's St. Paul?

"Relax. They're just crows."

"We should get out to the country more often."

About time!

An English Gold Field

"I'm going to be late... my driverless car is stick behind an autonomous tractor."

"He knows 'sit, stay, paw' and 'upstate.'"

...Well I've got to make sure I REALLY like where I am.

'Bed & Bagel'

"Excuse me sir, is this the environment..?"

'The one that really gets them is a quick jab from the floor, straight back and out.'

"I think I know why they call it 'Happydale'!"

Life is simpler in the sticks.

'I'd kill for concrete.'

'What a view! The motivational poster doesn't do it justice.'

This is probably the only time that Clem's name and the title 'Ph.D' will be used in the same sentence.

Speed enforced by tractor beam.

"Someday, son, all this will be yours..."

"There's only me, but if you can wait till Thursday week, there's a bloke in the mail truck!"

'Ma, come see what just crawled out of the woodpile.'

What's your returns policy on faulty goods?