Road Tripster Gifts

"Valet park only"

Unable to raise enough money for a trip to Paris, the Bartlesville High French Club had to settle for three days in Tulsa.

It's a Whole Field of Paisley!

'So what's it like riding in first class?'

Man painting over a 'You are here' sign.

"The GPS works great, we have satellite TV installed, the Sirius stereo sounds fantastic and our every move is tracked by Qualcomm. But could you turn around? I left me iphone at the house. . ."

A treasure map shows you all the roads without tolls.

Steep Hill, Slippery When Wet, Watch for Cars Going Faster Than You.

Grand Canyon. What's so great about the Grand Canyon?...Most of it's missing!

Road sign: 'No Passing Zone... This, too, shall pass.'

Unpopular Street Signs: Road Work Behind, Speed Jump Ahead, Good Luck, Slow Distracted Adults.

"What road do you want to dart across today?"

Coexist. Coexhaust.

Motor Tourism

Scenic Root: ants, bugs and worms using an exposed tree root as a scenic route.

A tortoise running along the side of the road, panting.

Songs about Texas, next 1100 miles.

'So much for your new Satnav!'

Kardiff.

'AHH, here it is! At the next intersection, turn left, then cough, following that, turn right, then cough...' WHEN DOCTORS NAVIGATE.

'Can you see what's causing the hold up?'

'Now here's a place I like!'

"Now you've seen the bust how about letting me see Naples?"

Cash Machines From Across the Land

'Do you know the way to San Jose without breaking into a Bacharach number?'

Camping.

'Kix? Yes, Ma'am -- you can get your Kix on aisle 66.'

'Are we broke yet?'

Computer Hitching a Ride to Silicon Valley

"I think our smart home is suffering from separation anxiety. It's following us."

'I think we took a wrong turn between the seventh and eight holes.'

'It's great to get back to the simple life'

'Of course you're out of gas. You forgot to fill up at the last stop...maybe this will teach you to stop daydreaming.'

Lady about flat tire: 'It's not too bad - it's only flat on the bottom.'

Sometimes Y Turn