Crop Comedian Gifts

The lesser of two weevils: "The farmer's worked really hard on his cotton crop. I say we leave it alone."

"You planted only beans and corn last year, right Herman...?"

"No, I like the plan. Just saying, have you ever done any actual tunnelling?"

"It's how he would have wanted to go."

'We're taking over tonight, it's the only way to save the farm.'

'How many times have I told you not to hit the ball with your head?'

"I wanted to plant my own food, but I couldn't find bacon seeds!"

'Henrietta is so self-confident.'

"Grapes, Rye, Malt... I got into this through my vegetarianism."

'Some dogs are meant to be working dogs and some aren't.'

Alas poor Daisy, I knew her well!

'Pass the salt, will ya, buddy?'

'Mother, there's something you're not telling me about that alien invasion, I can feel it!'

"Static cling."

"Don't be so dramatic. You tell me you're pregnant every day?"

"What's orange and sounds like a parrot? A carrot!"

'That GMO gene salesman was darn right!'

"There's got to be a better way to raise potatoes!"

"That was definitely mine."

Emergency room doctor about half cow: 'Farming accident. Be sensitive - she's beside herself.'

'MEN! We've got a fire at the cattle shed! Do we want rare, medium or well done?'

"I guess it must be that new growth hormone the farmer gave me!"

"The vegetables have gone bad!"

"I was hoping Calvin would grow up to be top sirloin..."

'That hussy. She's always first in line for insemination.'

'I finnaly located what was causing that hissing sound on the tractor.'

'I promise, you're not crossing to the Dark Side.'

'With proper flossing there's no reason for hens to not have teeth.'

"Ok, let's try it one last time. It's 'Ahhhhhh'..."

'Oh quit griping and be thankful we even got a bonus this year!'

'She says her stomachs ache.'

Grassy breath?

They're Brazillian!

Experimental Free Range Guinea Pigs For Sale.

Broccoli reading: 'Coping with Anthropomorphism'.