Country Quirkster Gifts

A centi-stampede.

I'm prepared to admit that you may have startled me a bit, sure!

A Highlander Chasing Dogs with a Knife and a Broom.

"Do you think there's intellegent life in there?"

"All dishes marked with an asterisk are served with sarcasm. . ."

Look at the size of that fork. She must be very hungry!

"Sorry I'm late! The driving conditions are awful!"

'Zeb, don't you reckon it's time you took that pig into town and traded him for some decent Wi'-Fi?'

'Is the water cold?'

Tree Mobsters. 'I didn't hear anything. Did you hear anything?' 'I didn't hear anything.'

"Obi-Wan Kenobi. You're our only hope."

'Just add eggs. That sounds easy.'

'I'd kill for concrete.'

Yoghurt man

"Perhaps it would be easier using mice?"

'I guess everything's okay, doc, two legs is showing, one out of each hole."

I've been doing sit-ups!

"Daisy had twin bull calves. How'd you do?"

"The summer people are coming! The summer people are coming!"

Jesus Seals the Hick...

'I'm afraid to a horse a carrot is just a carrot!'

'Serves me right for frowning.'

Over. Under. Sideways. Kid.

Farmer with gun shots instead of flying ducks

That's one harmonious butt hole!

A cow's bedside table.

Prank Cattle Calls. (mmph)

I'm a Smart-Cow!

Look, I'm not shocked. It's just that you sounded a bit different on the phone!

'I got 50p - how much did you get?'

"I'm on the range, but I'm not home on the range."

"He's been like this ever since he stopped eating the stuff and began smoking it."

Look lively ladies! We have 2 milk poachers at 3 o'clock!

'The cows are out and are not expected back.'

'You've played Pooh sticks right?'