Country Funster Gifts

She giveth and she taketh away!

"Being raised in the city, Fred didn’t quite grasp the true purpose of a game camera."

12 O'clock was 'I'm a tractor time.'

'Superstock'

"Forget the allowance - I need a benefactor!"

'Must really be a terrible headache you've got there, Doctor.'

"These few weeks off school have convinced me that I'm definitely a stay-at-home kid."

With Grandpa it was often a game of hide and sleep.

'The puppy just downloaded on your computer keyboard.'

Moo! OOM!

Police Cow!

"You think you hate me now, but just wait until I'm old and a burden to you."

'Before we begin, he's the one that's been helping me with my homework.'

The Horse Jump - One girl makes it over, the other is cover in leaves.

'Look. A mom with a handy carrying case.'

'He takes after your mother' (colour)

"Don't stress. My philosophy has always been 'ewe be ewe.''"

"Please let go of Daddy's chest hair."

"How do you like my 'Pop art'?"

"A raise? You want me to give you a raise? Do I look like f*ckin' Santa Claus?"

"We can do it on the net now... so it's off to the knackery for you."

'Young Master and I are both turning two: How come I'm so much more mature than he is?'

Oh yeah! It does echo when you moo very loudly!

I want to be a lawn!

'That hussy. She's always first in line for insemination.'

'Are you sure it's non-drowsy? I cannot afford to oversleep...'

"You spoil that boy."

'Not beans on toast again.' - 'No, toast on beans. I dropped it.'

Holy Cow

'Congratulations Mrs Marrow, it's a courgette.'

'Did you know that turkeys and dinosaurs are closely related? Meet my cousin, Lenny!'

Santa Randy was fired and Santa Claus got the job.