Country Club Kid Gifts

The 'tough' life of a boy growing up in upper-class Britain.

Culture Saturday

Mom! Don't call me abominadorable in front of my friends!

Look at the size of that fork. She must be very hungry!

A newspaper stand in a rural area.

'You had me at OOOO-AARRR!'

For every moment in life there is a song that describes it perfectly.'

"Well, the hills were alive with the sound of music...I'm sure!"

Jurassic Country Club.

"Now might be a good time to talk about your grip."

'I wasn't going to miss our game just because my wife landed me with junior. Besides, he's a great caddie.'

'I was doing okay 'til I stuck my neck out on guillotine.'

Putting out on the green is called 'The Short Game'.

"Folks new to country living quickly learn to tell the difference between "gravel roads" and dirt roads"."

"This one travels 30 yards farther when you throw it."

Eccentric clothing may tend to interfere with play.

Urban Squirrels

A Hunter Lokking For Birds To Shoot.

Man protecting himself from potential golfballs

'I don't care if it's only once every 17 years and crucial to a cicada's ability to attract a mate...'

'No wonder this club has such a low membership fee.'

"I'm guessing this is the first time Jack's had a chance to make par?"

"While we certainly congratulate you on your acceptance to the University of Hawaii, Sandra..."

'Momma, we elected you as honorable member of our club. You're in charge of eats and drinks.'

Scrabble night.

"I reckon we've gone too far accommodating them townies."

Angry golfer with gun

Golf Lady

"Golf is the only game that comes with a slave."

'Which do you prefer being called...'rich' or job creator'?'

"Golf is the worst fun anyone can have."

"Please take a seat and wait! The dentist is very busy today. He has almost done eighteenth holes!"

"It's right there in black and white, break two, win a prize."

I'd like to go on a merit based pay system.

The game requires no great physical strength...