Conference Events Gifts

"Nigel's boss told him to get in the conference photos at all costs"

"You're invited to our management excursion. Come dresses as a pinata."

'If I had to use one word to describe our strategy.'

'It has come to my attention that we need to hedge against our five-year plan.'

'I've learned a lot about myself at these meetings...like, I can fall asleep with my eyes open!'

Business meeting, CEO is dressed strangely as he asks: 'Any questions?'

Inclusive speech

"I wasn't the smartest guy in the room, but I was the loudest."

'The Board has chosen you to handle the restructuring because you have no heart.'

"We need to reset our fiscal compass to the changing business horizon."

"Fantastic presentation! All of the investors loved it."

The interested bystanders.

"Nervous about this morning's presentation?"

"Is it just a scary coincidence that the words 'changes' and 'unknown' both have 7 letters?"

'Wake me up when he doesn't use a buzzword.'

'Complete sentences?? Jeez, how verbose can you get?'

A business that thinks alike...sinks alike.

"And finally, I'd like to take any questions from the floor."

"'Meetingpalooza' sounded better in the brochure."

"He thought this would illustrate the company hierarchy more clearly than the organizational chart."

"I suggest we start with the low hanging fruit."

"As you can see, sales have been a little erratic lately..."

"I love these off-site business meetings."

Mark Zuckerberg

'I'm no expert, but I think we're a little behind when it comes to the latest industry technology.'

'Well ladies and gentlemen, I'm sure my little talk has made you all think'

"I don't think the guy with the business-card cannon has ever been to an actual networking event,"

"Now this chart should clear up any confusion you have with the report."

'Our goal is to stress di-versity while remaining a uni-versity.'

"Remember, if I can't introduce you it's because I can't remember their name - so that's when you step in and introudce yourself so we can get them to say it, okay?" - Company Party Prep.

'Remember, Henson; we're not here to hobnob - we're here to schmooze.'

'Unaccustomed as I am to public speaking...'

I've been looking forward to this the whole year: It can get lonely out there...

"We serve danishes because that's just how I roll!"

"I know we're not lions, but let's call ourselves a pride anyway."