Conference Attending Gifts

John couldn't help but think that his team had a different perspective on the event than he did...

'Thank-you for that amazing standing ovation. . .'

The Anti-Racism Conference

A Puppet Named Juan

"I was hoping this presentation would be more interesting upside down."

Grad School Parent-Teacher Conference

'I've learned a lot about myself at these meetings...like, I can fall asleep with my eyes open!'

Inclusive speech

The interested bystanders.

"Nervous about this morning's presentation?"

'Complete sentences?? Jeez, how verbose can you get?'

"'Meetingpalooza' sounded better in the brochure."

"And finally, I'd like to take any questions from the floor."

"I love these off-site business meetings."

'Well ladies and gentlemen, I'm sure my little talk has made you all think'

'Could we finish these negotiations via e-mail? That will allow me to think before I respond to your proposals.'

"I don't think the guy with the business-card cannon has ever been to an actual networking event,"

'Unaccustomed as I am to public speaking...'

"We serve danishes because that's just how I roll!"

I've been looking forward to this the whole year: It can get lonely out there...

Wearing a sales chart as a name badge.

Conference Pears

World Food Summit - No food and drink allowed in the auditorium.

'Time management seminar. Start: five-ish.'

'Is that a suspicious package in your pocket, or are you just happy to see me?'

'And in conclusion.'

Business coach hiding in speach desk.

Unintelligible speaker at Subway Announcers Dinner.

'Let me present today's speaker.'

'You think he overheard my last lecture on tax code revision?'

Is that one of those wafer thin computers?

Communication Breakdowns

Chaos Theory Conference.

'He has a very open mind. Everything goes in one ear and out the other.'

'Thanks for coming here today for my presentation, '10 cutting edge trends in the future of business analysis.' Copies of my talk will be available in the lobby in VHS and Betamax formats...'