Comical Seaside Enthusiast Gifts

'I think your pot has roasted.'

'Hang on a second, I think I have a sand castle in my shoe.'

Castro's successful invasion of miami beach.

Scene on the English coast.

'Mom, can I take the beach home as a souvenir?'

"Everybody out of the water! Lawyer!"

Champagne and Oysters

A bath at Boulogne. - Appalling position of Mr and Mrs Tomkins, who had a jib horse when the tide was coming in.

"To hear the sounds of the seas press 1, for all other options, or, to speak with a customer advisor, please press 2."

Rubber Ring

'I'm in hock up to my ears, I work in a dead-end job for eight bucks an hour, my wife and girlfriend are both pregnant - and you think you need help!'

'That's it. Now, give me a big smile!'

"She's sinking alright, Captain. Even the rats are wearing life jackets!"

Accident near the Pier

'Aren't you supposed to drop the clam on the rock?'

Punch and Judy - Soon to be a major motion picture.

"This is a perfect day. Nothin' can go wrong."

"You'll have to take my word for it. I'm not going up on the roof just to prove a point." (Seaview Guest House).

"If I'm drowning in my water bed at home, will you come and save me?"

'Yeah it's very Brighton!'

"It's the last time we do a beach holiday"

"Dang. . . everyehere you meet cargo ships jammed in front of the North Sea Ports!"

School Crossing

'I am wearing my bikini!'

'The double codpiece and chips is very popular with the Blackpool crowd, your highness.'

Man waiting to use a bathing machine

'Listen, yes, I'm an hermit, but a simple Hermit-Crab: I do not answer philosophical questions!'

Sea-Side Saturday Evening - The Arrival of the Husbands' Boat.

"OY! You trying to nick my chips?"

Fish Eye Tests.

'A working vacation, your honor?'

'The gannets are worse than the gulls!'

"Please listen carefully as our menu options have changed..."

"What harm could it do...?!?"

'You been sleep walking again?'