College Hoops Enthusiast Gifts

Wonderland Basketball. Wow! Lots of surprises going to the final four next week! How did the team with Goldilocks make it? Everything had to go just right! Rip van Winkle is a surprise, too. He hasn't been there in twenty years! And nobody can figure out how Hansel and Gretel found their way there. But I think the team with the wicked stepmother and her stepdaughter is the biggest shock! Yeah, it's a classic Cinderella story!

"Good game."

"We first met on the net. We began to court, but between my foul mouth and Wilson being on the rebound...let's just say it was a long shot, but he pressed, and I was defenseless. Now, we're as 'hoopy' as can be."

The Salmon Run

"Sarah's grades are excellent. She got A+ in 'Yogi Berra: Philosopher or Fall Guy?,' A in 'Dollars and Scents: An Analysis of Post-Vietnam Perfume Advertising,' A in 'The Final Four as Last Judgment: The N.C.A.A. Tournament from a Religious Perspective,'

Another reason Chihuahuas hate basketball.

'He's gonna dunk on me. I just know it.'

Playing pig

'It's a combination of March Madness,,, and Linsanity,'

Why moms make bad refs.

The feeding frenzy has begun, gorging ourselves on bowl after bowl of college football.

I love Basketball.

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Basketball.

'You sure complain a lot for someone who says he loves nature.'

'Hold on, Pepe!... The score is tied with less than a minute to go - and the losing team gets boiled.'

Puppy.

'This is it, gentlemen. The big game. A date with dentistry.'

'In this league, guys, it's all about winning. And we're like, what, 0 and 10? That's why coach got the ax.'

Try Our New Slam Dunk Coffee and Donut Special.

'Please, Dad? Can we? Can we? Pleeeease?'

'Billy - no! Do not ask for his autograph. He'll lose his natural fear of fans, become a nuisance, and then he'll need to be tranquilized and relocated to Europe.'

Kobe Bryant

'I just wish that meant getting ready for the prom instead of the NCAA basketball tournament.'

Game In A Can.

'When you said, Dream Team, I thought you meant the Swiss Bikini Team.'

'... and finally, before tip-off, let's all be courteous and turn off our cell phones.'

PSYCHIATRIC CLINIC, 'You know what I dread? -- March madness!'

'Five seconds! ...Four ...Three ...Two ...One ...SPRING!!'

'Good news, it's not mad cow...it's March madness.'

'Guys! The turnovers are KILLING us!'

Basketball injuries.

'He's got a good attitude, and he's tall. But he's got to get into the weight room.'

'I hate playing stinkbugs! Every time we press them on defense, they just let 'e rip!'

'... And for $50 more, this is the same basketball shoe in a turbo model.'